What’s poppin’ comrades?!?! Recently, I have added “Love You Some You” to my speaking conference option list for bookings and this is my short blog version. First and foremost, I am NOT a doctor or a psychologist. I am simply ME. A woman who is deeply in love with herself yet humble and throughout the years my experiences have enabled me to reach a comfortable equilibrium with these two and I believe it is my calling from the Creator to share these experiences and lessons with those who need or want to hear. Not to mention, I receive many questions pertaining to self-love and related issues in my in boxes everyday. I would like to thank everyone who has ever confided in me publicly or secretly because helping you has increased my confidence, wisdom and enlightened me in so many ways. No, it does not bother me at all so there is no need to ask that question nor apologize anymore! I consider this to be a blessing and I am willing to confidentially help you all to the best of my ability with absolutely no strings attached…
We were all designed to win. When God crafted you, He did not pick names from a hat deciding who wins and who loses at life. Dreams are fulfilled through the simplicity of inner peace and joy, faith and our unyielding determination. I’ve heard many wise people refer to our minds as a lake. When the lake is still, silent and at peace, it becomes much easier to discover the ripples and current of the water. Find your current and GO WITH IT. Do NOT fight against the current or turn away from the spin because destiny cannot be defeated. Just relax and flow with it for a change and see how much peace comes into your life. Success becomes more attainable once you are in touch with your gifts and in those ripples lie God’s gifts to you, His plans and your entire purpose for existence in this world. So contrary to popular belief, you really were not put here just to take up space, eat, shit, have fun and sleep!
Our biggest distraction is that we get so blinded and jammed up with media, materialism, ignorance and other worldly beliefs that we fail to see brilliance. We also become bitter and resentful of those who were blessed with more financial stability or materialistic things. Yes, it is easy to make it when you have money and when you come from money but longevity should be your goal and this is birthed through hunger. For example; think about your idols and his or her stories…it’s probably is not a fairytale full of lilies, rainbow band aids, Popsicles and snowflakes!! The most determined and successful people were crafted amidst the storm. And please don’t assume that just because they are successful or rich that they are freed from storm!! Most likely, they’re still in it but just found their comfort and silence within the eye of the storm. My personal favorites come from struggles! Tyler Perry, Michael Eric Dyson, Oprah Winfrey, Jada Pinkett Smith, Lauryn Hill, Bernie Mac, Erykah Badu, etc.! Now this is not to suggest that you model yourself after anyone because I personally believe that is a huge mistake considering the fact that there is only one you and when comparing yourself to anyone else, you fail before you even begin. It’s okay to admire and even embody certain characteristics of our favorite people but we ALL fall short of a full deck of perfection so we can only change or embrace our own flaws and shortcomings. Have a sense of unshakable pride in your character! Love your struggles and downtimes and pay close attention because these are the times God gave you not to make you suffer but to become more in touch with yourself and also to distinguish the real friends from the wolves in sheep’s clothing. I always say, “WHEN TIMES ARE TOUGH TWO-FACED PEOPLE DON’T COME AROUND OR CALL, BECAUSE IT’S TOO HARD TO STAB YOU WHEN YOUR BACK IS AGAINST THE WALL”!! Think about it.
“He is his own best friend and take delight in privacy whereas the man of no virtue or ability is his own worst enemy and is afraid of solitude” -Aristotle.
Another valuable key to loving you some you is spending time with yourself in order to become your own biggest fan. Say for instance; when you meet your soul mate, the more time you spend with him or her, the deeper you fall in love with that person. You become familiar with hidden attributes about them that you never knew and you admire each one more than the last. So in order to fall deeper in love with yourself, it is VITAL to spend time BY YOURSELF. Write, type, make faces in the mirror, dance, exercise, sing, meditate…hell, TALK to yourself if you have to! Just spend time by yourself!! Do not allow the fear of loneliness to consume you!! Look into a mirror and instead of finding something to complain about, find something you like about yourself even if it’s your earlobe! LOVE that earlobe!! Praise that earlobe dammit!! Eventually, you will find more and more things to admire. Do not be afraid to look at yourself because in your mirror is the one who holds the key to your future and the only one who stands in your way! Self-confidence is bliss.
To be continued…
To hear the radio version of one part of my Love You Some You series, please click here: